Ernie: "Hey Jim, how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?" Jim then breaks down and cries deeply at Ernie's question as the fact that he was born without a tongue continues to slowly tear him apart.

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Did you hear about the guy with five penises? Me neither, because that sounds like a very improbable aberration.

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a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and bacomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into shit.

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A woman walks into the living room while her husband is watching tv. The husband tells her "Make me a Sandwich", so she goes to the kitchen and makes him a sandwich like shes told to.

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Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because it tastes good.

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69...you know how awkward this is now...

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What did the cancer patient get for his birthday HIV

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Yo mamas so ugly that when she looked out the window, she was arrested for mooning.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black

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Roses are red. Violets are black. Why is your chest, As flat as my back?

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Why can't Hellen Keller read, write, or do anything really? Because, shes a woman.

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What do you call a fast black man with big muscles? A good source of minorities evolving.

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whats brown, lying in a ditch, and is covered in cookie crumbs? a girl scout that got hit by a truck

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What do skeet disks and Jewish babies have in common? Hitler used to shoot them out of the sky.

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Cleveland sports, lebron james' ever receding hairline

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Roses are Red Violets are Purple But nothing rhymes with purple.

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whats funnier than a banana an orange -may bieber

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What did the carrot say to the apple? Sandals

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whats the difference between friends and cement? if you soak friends in liquid and then repeatadly shock them they will die

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Why did the man cross the street? Because he had to go work.

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A tiger walks into a bar, the patrons ran out terrified.

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Why didn't the boy get any presents for christmas? There is no Santa Claus.

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Q. What is the answer to life? A. 34

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Why did Teddy eat dirt? Because he was hungry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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