An Hispanic married couple walked into a popular restaurant. The waiter arrived at their table and asked what they would like to eat. The husband ordered a steak and his wife ordered a salad. They both enjoyed their food, payed the bill and happily walked out of the restaurant.

Roses are red, Your blood is too, Don't believe me? I WILL CUT YOU

what do you call cheese that isn't yours? cheese.

What did the racist white guy say to the black guy? Nigger

Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but orange gourds. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's dog? Neither has anyone else, because it ran away yesterday, and was most likely hit by a car.

why did the chicken cross the road? well... to get to the other side.

Q. What's the difference between a Mcdonalds employee and a gynecologist? A. They have different jobs.

Not gonna tell you, that was one weird story, I feel like super high right now.

Whats The difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash And one is a watermelon

Why did the guy read anti jokes? because there funny

What do you call a man with no arms or legs sitting on a doorstep? Whatever his name happens to be

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? A cripple.

Why did the man fall of his bicycle? Because someone threw a fridge at him

Two gay guys walked in to a bar. It's unfair of me to make the assumption that they're gay, they just be really good friends whom aren't opposed to touching each other.

who is jacked and looks like a beast? • James Cornish

Snake: YES muahaha Eve eat the fruit from the three of wisdom muahahaha! Why do you not share with Adam? Muahahaha! Snake: Why is nothing happening? Then the sky opened and a heavenly voice spoke: "Well as long as none eats fruit from the three of KNOWLEDGE... Hmm, I better get rid of it altogether..." Snake: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!

Whats the difference between a black man and a pizza? A pizza is an inanimate object, while a black man is a person. racist F.u.c.k.

How come the dog didn't want to go into the sun? -Because it didn't want to turn into a hotdog.

a blonde walks in to a bar, the bar tender gives him a free drink because he's a man and it's nazi germany

what is my catphrase nothing I am too good to have one

...IIITS... :) SMILEY :( AND MADDY THE HORSEHEAD SHOW ITS :) SMILEY :( AND MADDY THE HORSEHEAD SHOW! :) YAY! :(SHADDAP YUUU! Episode one... The waiting for the wait!

What do you call a dog that has no legs? It doesn't matter because he will never come.

Get up Look in the mirror

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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