What do you do when you see a black man getting hitted by a Mexican taxi? -Call 911

Three men walk into a bar because they were all blind.

What's the difference between marmalade and jam?... you can't marmalade your dick down a girls throat.

They say under Chuck Norris's beard, is just a chin.

Yo mama is so old, she might die soon! - Louis

Q~ What did the black man say to the priate when he pulled out a AK47? A~ "This is a gun. im going to kill you with it."

Q. Why can’t a Skeleton Lift Weights? A. He’s all bone & no muscle.

What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels.

Customer: Waiter, waiter, there is a fly in my soup! Waiter: Sorry madam.

What does a dinosaur and TImmy's mom have in common? They're both dead

a chicken crosses the street to ask a man: what is an anti-joke? the man replies: a joke the chicken responds: so why do they call it an ANTI-joke? the man answers: why did the horse walk into a bar? the chicken retorts: you can't answer a question with a question! the man replies: you're a figment of my imagination, nah nah nah nah i can't hear you.

I had a joke about a tie, but it wasn't funny.

How did you feel after smoking that joint? I felt like going to pass out And then? I passed out

what did the short man say to the shoe? i sincerely hope that someone wouldn't try to carry a conversation with an inannnimate object, or else he is socially disturbed

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Not having enough money to buy an apple.

What did the man say to the waiter when he was about to tip him? I'm not gay, but $20 is $20.

How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

What's long, yellow, and can kill you if swallowed? A school bus

What is a hammer? It's not a screwdriver

What's the difference between a Ferrari and 50 dead babies? Where the hell would you even find 50 dead babies? That would be really disturbing.

whats worse than failing your maths test? getting aids

A man named Jake walks into a bar. The bartender says hi jake... The End

Q:Why do you never run over black guy on a bicycle A: Because that is not a very nice thing to do

yo momma is so fat she ate the rest of the joke

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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