Do not be unreasonable now, as for the twenty five million dollars, it is the least I can do, but if we cannot agree upon acting with some reason and dignity, as refraining from insults, then no conflict will ever be solved... ...I will send you my contact information shortly, expect the money within the week, three or four days tops. Would you be interested in learning more about our order? We make good use of people such as you. With all due respect, I would not exactly lend my sister to anybody that brags about engaging into intercourse with his own sister.

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What did the muslim do at the airport? He bought a ticket to New York and proceeded to fly there to mourn his brother who was killed during the terrorist attacks on 9/11.

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in an oven.

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If a tree falls in the forest, does anyone hear it? no, but it was home to several endangered species that are now extinct

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How do you eat a sandwich With yo mouth bi tch

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What's the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? The wheelchair

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What did Abraham lincoln do after getting assassinated? Certainly not riding a bike thats for sure.

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knock knock who's there who who who who who what are you a retarded owl

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I used to be an adventurer like you, but then I was raped by a giant scorpion...

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What did the Asian say after he had a nightmare? Nothing his nightmare was actually reality and a dishwasher fell on him and killed him.

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Yo mama so fat when she dresses in red she looks like clifford the big red dog!

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Roses are angry Violets are too My head is scratchy I need shampoo

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guess what>? your mum lol

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I am epileptic. SLAWWAWASWAKHINGAGAGAGAKIHARGAVBAZSAWAWAWAWAAAAA

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What's so funny about Mexicans? Nothing. They're all humans too.

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A: What do you call a female bombing the white house? Q: A terrorist

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Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was tired of this joke.

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thumbs up if you want 10 dollars to ya paypal.. email me @ sickguy42@hotmail.com

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A: Knock Knock B: (No Reply) Nobody is home and the man trying to get in will come back later and try again.

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Why was Tigger looking in the toilet? He was looking for pooh

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A baby elephant steps on a lego. First thought, auch, huh ?! Actually, the lego was fine with it and so was the baby elephant. Now they're married and are expecting a baby legophant.

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A man sees another man standing at the edge of a tall bridge looking down. Man: Don't jump! No one wants you to die. You have your whole life to live and I'm sure you will find happiness somewhere. I was once in the same position as you, questioning if god really wanted me on this earth at all. But I decided to make something of myself and now I am a very successful busness man. You can do the same if you just put your mind to it and put your troubles behind you. Other man: I was just admiring the view.

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Why was the little boy crying? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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What do you call a mexican working at Taco Bell? An intelligent young man who recently graduated from high school, but due to his family's lack of money, he cannot pay for college, which is one of the reason's why he is working. He also needs money becuase he has a child on the way, due to his poor choice of not using protection while having intoxicated relations with his girlfriend. I wish him the best of luck!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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