There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

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How do you drown a blonde? Put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of the pool then don't let her come up for air.

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A man with ADD walks into a bar. He then.......Damn Nature, you scary!

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Bitch

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Little Brianna has a special body part. That's why I kidnapped and sexually assaulted her.

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How did Bill Framex die? He didn't because he isn't real.

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Two men are sitting on the couch watching sports, the first man farts, the second chuckles. They continue watching their program.

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There once was a man from Peru, Who fell into an extremely deep sleep and woke up just before he choked to death on his shoe rubber.

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MILEY CYRUS: ONLY GOD CAN JUDGE ME! ME: O GOD CALLED HE SAID YOUR A HOE TO

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A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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What did the girl get with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Cancer.

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cool

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"Why is Barney green and purple?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way."

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Q: What did Helen Keller say to the bartender? A: "I would like a bud lite please" it was a different Helen Kellar

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Bitch! Love, J.B.

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Q: Why are asians good at math? A: Because they study with their tutor every tuesday

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i actually read the terms of service before i posted this

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs on the doorstep? The Diabetes man

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wat is the difference between rainbows and poop? I LOVE RAINBOWS!

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." The man of the house subsequently notifies his government that genetic engineering is going awry.

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69 cents for a rainbow donut shaped as a 69....

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How come the twin boys wanted to climb a tree for fun today? Because They both wanted to commit suicide...

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A child walk's into a bar. And gets sexually abused.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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