Q: whats the difference between a t.v and a dead baby? A: i don't have a t.v in my garage

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Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, I'm blind.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why did the chiken cross the road? It didn't, J-walking is against the law.

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How do you kill a dumb blonde? Stab them in the chest 43 times.

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Horse walks into a bar. 'The barman says 'why the long face?' The horse says 'I've got cancer'.

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why did the boy stay home from school? it was saturday

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roses are red violets are blue polar bears are white grass tends to be green

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What did the depressed teenage fat kid do to resolve his issues? Commited suicide.

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What did the muffin say to the oven? Obviously nothing since neither one can talk.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It escaped.

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what did the man say to his cat? sex. -teagan doherty

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What do you call a black person with a million dollars? A millionaire.

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What do you call Ed Milliband after he's been decapitated? Dead Milliband.

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how do you get a cat out of a tree? with boomerangs

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Why did the lamborghini drive off the cliff? Because the person driving was a fridge

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As he stood in her front yard with a boombox in the pouring rain, she leaned her head out the window with a smile and he was electrocuted.

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What do you call it when someone walks on another person's head? It depends. Face up, fetish. Face down, hate crime.

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A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

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Why did the white supremacist stab the black man? He believed his race to be superior to that of the black man, thus he resorted to violence in order to display his supremacy.

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How do you stop a baby from drowning? Take your foot of his head

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What does chuck norris do at 4 o clock in the morning ? Sleep

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What do you get when you mix 5 bottles of beer, a bottle of vodka, 3 glasses of red wine, and 15 jello shots? Alcohol poisoning.

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? A little boy falls into the mud Wanna hear a clean joke? He takes a bath with bubbles Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is Michal Jackson.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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