What do you do when you find a blonde on her knees? Help her up, because obviously she has fallen.

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WHATS WORSE THAN THE HOLOCAUST A FLAT TIRE

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A blonde, brunette and redhead are walking in the forest when they come across a set of tracks. The brunette says, "Those are dear tracks." The redhead says, "Those are elk tracks." The blonde says, "Those are moose tracks." They are then hit by bus.

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how do you make lady gaga cry you poke here face then rape here.

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Stab her.

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What do call a man with no arms or no legs that sits on the couch? Grandpa after his amputations.

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why was the kid crying his dad is a alchoholic

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A man and a woman are in a bar. The man says, "Excuse me miss, but you're very attractive, may I please buy you a drink?" to which the woman replies, "Thank you very much, but I'm afraid I've never been to Mexico."

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World peace

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What is the longest word in the English language? SMILES: there is a mile between the first and last letters!"

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair Fuzzy Wuzzy died of cancer

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Q: Why did the Unicorn cross the road? A: It didn't Unicorns are fictional creatures.

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800000000000000000?0?00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000?0000 I hate you

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SUCK MY NUTS

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He decided to sail to Portland. He cast off and was never seen again.

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MAKE TEA NOT WAR!

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Roses are red Violets are blue I gotta go to the bathroom

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How do you keep a dummy in suspense for 24 hours? Tell him his wife suffered from a severe concussion and that he'll have to wait until morning to see if she's okay

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"I had angry birds before it was cool." -Alfred Hitchcock

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What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter, he won't come.

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Who paved the road? The fat guy with the steam roller

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas A bike.

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how do you make a plumber cry? you kill his family

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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