roses are red violets are blue they are pretty and you are not

thumb_up thumb_down -8

hey i just met you and this is crazy but so

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Knock knock. Who's there? The police. You wife was killed in an accident.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

When life throws you lemons, duck.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the black man say to the Jew? Hi.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

what is not funny? This joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

So there's this bigass moose, and it goes in the store and it asks the lady bitch "where the potatoes at" and the lady bitch says "down aisle 5" so the moose goes down to isle 5 and there aint no potatoes.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Once a upon of time, there was a very big kangaroo named Jake. Well one day Jake was eating some food when suddenly a bunch of humans came and saw him. One human name Willie went over to take some pictures of the animal. The Jake ran away.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

a black guy with a parrot on his shoulder was walking down the street. another man asked, "where did you get him?" The parrot said, "theres tons of them in africa."

thumb_up thumb_down +20

womens rights.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What is the one thing you can never steal back? Your viginity.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's more satistfying then good sex? A nice loud, stinky fart.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

how many babies does it take o paint a house depends on how hard you throw them

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How can you tell if a joke is skept? Tell it to raysean and see if he laughs

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A teacher, a consturction worker, and an army general are on an airplane. The pilot tells them the plane has too much weight, and if they don't each drop one item then the plane will crash. Realizing one item each is obviously not enough weight to throw off, the teacher and the construction worker team up and throw the army genral off the plane. They land safely, and live the rest of their life haunted by their vile actions.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

If life gives you lemons, Eat them.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme. This one doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A man had a terminal illness. He died a few months after he was diagnosed.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? AHHHH WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS!?!?!? MY HAND!!! MY HAND!!! AHHHHHHH!!!!! JUST KILL ME!!! PLEASE WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?!?! MY OTHER HAND AHHHH!!! HAHAAAAAAAAAaaaa..... AHHHHHHH WHY?!?! MY LEG!!!! MY FOOT NO!!!!! PLEASE!!!!! Ah AH AHHHHH!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

whats white and if it fell from a tree it would kill you ? Pat Butcher

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How long did it take for Michael to screw in the lightbulb? 37 minutes. Michael has cerebral palsy.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Why was Mary mucky? Because she was dragged to a field and raped

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Where's my shotgun

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Your family is dead. Your family is dead, who? Your family is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops