A man walks into his cubicle and sits down. After a long day of work, he goes home and happens to die whilst eating dinner.

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Two members of the KKK walk into the bar into a bar. The bartender asks, "what do you think of Obama?" One of the KKK members says "he is my President, I respect him."

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how do you kill a blonde? hit her in the back repeatedly with a crowbar

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why did suzy get hit by the bus because she got dumped into the road and she had no legs

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Your mother is so large she finds it difficult to fit into regular sized clothing

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself at night.

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Two muffins are put in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says, "is it just me or is it getting hot in here?". The other muffin says,"HOLY CRAP!!!!! A TALKING MUFFIN!!!!".

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Do you know what Chuck Norris does for a living? He's an actor, I also heard he's quite good with martial arts.

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What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench can support a family of four.

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I have Alzheimer's, i pee out gold, racoons

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A man comes home from work and finds his wife in bed with his next-door neighbor. Furious, he shouts 'What's the meaning of this?!' And his wife answers 'A pronoun used to identify a specific person or thing close at hand or being indicated or experienced'.

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How come Helen Keller didn’t scream when she fell off the cliff? Because at 19 months she contracted an illness that left her blind and deaf and therefore never learned to properly use her vocal cords

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like this if you think what ever you want to..

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What's worse than getting no up-votes on an anti-joke? Getting down votes

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What time will the little girl get up for school? Never, she died in her sleep.

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What's a boulder's favorite type of music? Boulders don't have ears.

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Whats worse than eating a worm? Haveing a worm die in your penis.

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Why do guys like Halloween? Martin Luther posted the 95 theses in 1517 on this day.

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Knock, knock Who's there? You're adopted...

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What did the cannibal say after he ate the clown? I am not sure as the tragic situation occurred while the clown was hiking alone.

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What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

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Q. What do you call a small hen that can't lay eggs properly? A. A small hen that can't lay eggs properly.

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whats orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot

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You want to know how I know you're gay You want to have sex with a person of the same sex

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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