69

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your mamas so fat she falls out f both sides of the bed

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Wanna hear 2 short jokes and a long joke? Joke, joke , joooooookkkeeee

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Got milk? No.

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Q: What do you call a black man sitting on a bench? A: Whatever his name is.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? punch her in the dick.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. ( to heaven )

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whats the difference between santa claus and jewish people santa claus goes down the chimney and jewish people go up

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A businessman walks out of a store with his new haircut he was bald.

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Yo momma so fat she has more chins than a Chinese phonebook. Chins in a phonebook? I don't get it.

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your amazing just the way you are... even though you have aids.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't because he was dead.

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A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor performs the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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Your mom is so stupid... She was unable to go to college and therefore was not able to find a good job.

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What do you call someone who has slept for 48 hours straight? Dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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Why did the indian man take the peanuts out of his lunch? Because he's allergic.

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What happend when Chuck Norris did a push up? He did one push up.

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Do you know what Ethiopian food tastes like? Neither do they

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? The Police, your family just died in a car accident/

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Roses are shit Violets are my dick Guess what I do for a living? Sex with refrigerator monkeys!

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When my Xbox died, my girlfriend said: "Finally, you can treat me the same way you treated that thing!" So I tapped her so hard that she died

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What's big, black, wide, long, and has white lines all over it? A new highway road.

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Rebecca Black sings a song.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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