Why couldn't the man get up to obtain a beverage? His legs were broken.

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why did chuck norris walk on water? because he's chuck norris

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What's green, grows in my basement, and if fun to smoke? Mold. I lied about it being fun to smoke.

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What do you call a donkey on Christmas? a donkey.

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why can't the bat see? Because it's made of metal

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im not food

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? He lacked the required muscular, integumentary, and nervous systems required to do so (among other essential bodily systems).

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Vaginal secretions

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what has a hard shaft and an even harder head? A hammer

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Why are black people afraid of chainsaws? Because chainsaws are potentially dangerous and could cause much harm if handled without prior knowledge of how to use them.

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A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. It started raining and an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful time. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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These Jokes suck.

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Two pretzels were walking down the street. One was assaulted. The other, witnessing what he'd seen, developed a harsh stereotype.

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What did the white guy say to the Mexican guy? Nothing he realize that the Mexican guy probably didn't speak English and he couldn't speak Spanish so conversing with this man would have been pointless.

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Q: How many ghetto people does it take to carry a fat gorilla? A: 14

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So a train conductor is going at 70 mph to to a destination 50 miles away. He goes over 3 hills, one at 20 mph, the other 42 mph, and the last at 63 mph. He crosses 2 bridges at 47 mph each. What did the train conductors mom eat for dinner that night Nothing she had cancer and died.

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Well, I guess it's back to the drawing board.

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My life

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A vegetarian walked into a butcher Luckily he realized where he was and walked out!

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Whats faster than a black man running away from the cops? The speed of light.

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Why did kurt cobain kill himself? He was experiencing heavy depression

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What is purple pink and goes over 10000 miles per hour. Barnney in a tornado

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Sugar is sweet. You're adopted.

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What is big, red, and eats rocks? A big red rock-eater

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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