What did Christopher Columbus say to his men before they got on the ship? "Men, get on the ship."

What did Jerry Sandusky do when he was alone with 3 little boys? Taught them how to play football.

What did a tampon say to the other tampon? Nothing, they were both stuck up bitches.

whats first than finding a worm in your apple? a blonde who asks you why there is a worm in your apple

porcupines love sun bathing in the winter months so it dosent rape their nose hairs

Yo mama so fat she sells shade. Yo mama so fat she needs cheat codes for wii fit. Yo mama so fat she in call of duty when a player kills her they get a 5 person kill streak. Yo mama so fat that she is fat. :)

A man dropped his pen so he picked it up. He is satisfied that he is a sufficient worker.

How do you make a baby cry? Break its legs.

What's the difference between a bagpipe and an onion? No one cries when you cut up a bagpipe. Posted by: BerserkSpoon

Q: What is the difference between a duck? A: That question doesn't make any sense.

A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. But it wasn't as good as he had hoped it would be.

what did the black guy say to the white guy? black guy: hello how are you doing white guy: good i guess.... just heard they shut down KFC black guy: that sucks

Why'd jimmy drop his candy wrapper? He was brutally melested and stabbed I the eyeballs with forks and cut into pieces before he could make it to the trash can. He was then thrown into the trash can he was going to.

A kid who lost parents is called an orphan and a wife who lost her husband is called a widow. What do you call parents who lost their child? Free on the Weekends.

Your mama is so fat that when she walks her legs rub against each other

What happened the magic tractor? It turned into the feild!

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? "Robin, get in the Batmobile."

Rose are brown, Violets are brown, Who keeps pooping in my garden?

What did the picture say to the man? Don't frame me

If Waldo and Carmen Sandiego had a child it would be fictional.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 was black

Guess what? You just lost the game.

Uh, "Abel", seriously get over here and then get some sleep, not only did you get the code all wrong, there is no number to be deciphered at all, besides its called a laptop with a battery. Speaking of general dumbass... You have not changed the least, you really remind me of a cruel, sloppy, less disciplined (except the wise cracking thing Nero resorted to to push me away and apparently dodge gun fire, maybe his way of handling nerves. You might look like him, but personality wise you are completely different, cruel, sloppy, graphical, I mean did you ever see Nero get angry? I never did. That said Neo-Nero, you are a nice guy too, especially if you get here fast enough, I mean this place is freezing.

Guy 1: Ever heard of Ethiopian food? Guy 2: No habla espanol... Guy 1: Oh....

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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