What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? Roast Beef is a solid and Pea Soup is a liquid

What? Huh?

What's more fun than thumbing down a shit joke? Thumbing down a shit joke which is neutral previous to your disliking giving it a little negative number.

What do you call someone with the world biggest encyclopedia on their head? Dead.

What do you call a person who is 6 feet under? Lost.

What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick

what did the Mexican fire fighter name his two kids? Jose and Josbe

Why do I staple a mans mouth to his penis. Because I wanted to

Why did the cookie go to the doctor, beause he was feeling really crumby...becuase he has testicular cancer

Q: Why didn't Little Jhonny go to school today? A: There was no school today.

Arrow to the Knee

Nah, could not care less about how I sound on "The network", its just that I spent all night finishing the core concept to my new novel, and all the capital letters and stuff sound like Jim Carrey in my head as I type. So Redcunt, where you going? When you coming back?

why is my wife crying? because she doesn't like tomatoes

Q: What do you call 5 white guys sitting on a bench A: The NBA

what did sandy say to mr krabs nothing squirles are not smart enough to make a air tank and go under water

A Frenchman, an Irishman, and a Russian walk into a bar. The Frenchman orders a glass of wine, the Irishman orders a whisky, and the Russian, who prefers to be sober, orders a glass of water. They have an all-around pleasant night, yet they leave the bar upset. Why? A severe water contamination in the town resulted in the Russian man consuming a fatal dose of arsenic.

What's worse than getting raped then killed? Getting killed then raped.

Why did the chicken cross the traffic filled road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? Chicken delivery.

Jake snow steals ideas he doesn't make them up

Useful Information: *2+2=5 *4+4=9 *6+6=13 Q: Given this information, how many fingers am I holding up? A: It was a trick question. Batman didn't open the door.

Why couldn't Mary see the painting? Because she had no face.

What do you call a lesbian eskimo? The name she was given at birth.

What did the fish want to drink? Charlie Brown

What was the first thing the mother did when her baby was born? Weep. The baby was a was a stillborn.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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