"What's wrong?" "I can't fap." "Why not?" "Because I saw your face."

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What's black and white and red all over? A mime that got hit by a truck.

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-Knock, Knock -Who's there? -Granny -You don't sound like Granny... -Just let me in little boy. -MOM!!!!!

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Breast cancer.

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Leave her alone...

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What is the difference between a refrigerator? Seven anchors because blue isn't vital for turtles to fornicate.

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What do Tom Cruise and Santa Claus have in common? They are both are fat and have beards, except for Tom Cruise.

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There's a football player who walks into a bar and sees a gay guy. The gay guy says, "So you're a football player, right?" The football player says, "Yes." The gay guy says, "I have a game of football myself. It's called fart football. It's where you drink a mug of beer in less than five seconds and then you drop your pants and fart for the extra point." The gay guy goes first. He drinks the mug of beer in less than five seconds and farts. The football player goes. He drinks the mug of beer in less than five seconds then he drops his pants and before he farts, the gay guy says, "BLOCK THAT KICK! BLOCK THAT KICK!"

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what do you do when mrs curaba gets heated through a fridge at her so she can cool down

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Male leadership.

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What do you call a black woman who had 4 abortions? A Crimestopper

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What is the difference between a baby and a tree? Its not illegal to hit one with an axe

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Naw, not now, I don't want to be assimilated, I am a bit of a wuss right now, really tired.

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Why did the Kitty stop meowing? Because its dead.

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Why had the father left his family. Because he was tired of dancing in a circle.

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Where does Elmo live? In Sesame Street.

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What's green and black? Grass with wheels.

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your mammas so big that she needs paint rollers to put on lipstick

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what do You call a white man killing a black man? a accident

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What is the difference between a pillow and a rock The rock could hert you.

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The NHL playoffs

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What do you call a person with no eyes, ears, or mouth? Helen Keller

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An Irishman and his sheep are locked in a barn together for 3 days. On the 3rd day his wife finally notices that he is gone, and comes looking in the barn for her husband. She liberates him, cooks him dinner, and they both laugh at the bestiality that occurred in the barn. 3 days is indeed a long time for anyone to endure.

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how many babies does it take to paint a house depends on how hard you throw em

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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