Boy: "Mom, I don't want to walk in circles anymore." Mother: "Shut up or I'll nail your other foot to the ground."

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Whats worse than having a woman faking an orgasm? Having a guy fake one.

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What's invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts. What's invisible and smells like rabbit farts? Carrots, if you're blind.

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When you wish upon a star... ... you're actually a few million years late, according to astronomy. The star is dead. Just like your dreams.

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What starts with an N and ends with R, that you wouldn't want to call a black person? Neighbor

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Why was Steve hungry? Because the last time he ate was yesterday.

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What's the difference between a train and a lamp? A lot

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What did you get for your birthday? I got older

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive Cause she's a woman

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What did the T-Rex say to the caveman? Nothing. Tyrannosaurus Rex was a prehistoric land animal that roamed the Earth roughly 65 million years before the appearance of man. Making such a conversation impossible.

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why was the panda sent to prison? he played a major roll in the bombing of 9-11

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What do you call a black man carrying a T.V? Someone that is helping me move.

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jack and jill went up the hill to get a bucket of water. jack fell down and broke his ankle and neck severely. jack and jill were taken away from their parents by child services, and their parents are charged for child endangerment and child labor.

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A blind man walks into a bar. Nobody is surprised.

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What happened to the alcoholic man that decided to never drink ever again? He died of thirst. Moral: Alcohol was the only available liquid in this twilight zone... Anti anti joke

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Your mothers so stupid she is retaking her college courses so she can get a better job and support her family.

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Your mom is so retard that she needs "special help" from medical professionals. :3 <33

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Why did the plane crash? Chuck Norris was sitting in it, and thus his weight was countless times larger than the lift force of the plane.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken is now getting flowers for her dead children that got hit buy multiple cars, also the chicken is a human mother.

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Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Oh wait I shouldn't tell you, it's too long

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I asked her where you were.

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—Conversation started today— My God, why have you forsaken me? Seen 6:00 PM

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What did the doctor say to the other doctor? Hey bill

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Yo mama is so fat she lost 100 pounds and now she's not fat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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