What do you call a watermelon in Africa? A watermelon.

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There is a man who is half black half Jewish. He walking up a hill really fast. What happens to him? Answer: The Jewish side of his body will fall off and the black side will walk away.

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A man walks into a bar Ouch

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Whats the difference between a dead baby and a corvette? I didn't get 20 years for owning a corvette.

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Roses are Red. Violets are Blue. But Roses can also be White. And Violets should be Purple

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My dog got out of its cage So I found it and beat the shit out of my neighbors kid.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, as it was crossing the road it tripped on a rock. When it was getting back up, a bus went through a stop sign and ran it over. After suffering for 3 weeks in an animal hospital, the chicken died.

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what is the difference between an octopus and a dead dolphin? one as tentacles the other is dead.

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Why don't pineapples grow on pine trees? Because they're tropical.

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Yo mama is so dumb that she failed the SATs

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A panhandler came up to me today and said he hadn't had a bite in weeks, so I gave him some change.

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Wanna know who doesnt no how to right a joke? Who ever wrote this...

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Q. How do Italian girls shave their legs? A. They lie down outside and have someone mow them.

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face.

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Have you ever tried Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

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WHO WANTS SOW????

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oh hi, i'm an idiot, i mean mitt romney

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A polar bear walks into a bar, sits down, and says, "Can I have a.........................beer?" The bartender asks, "Why the large pause?" The bear responds, "I have a speech impediment"

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What did the kid in the wheelchair get for Christmas? AIDS.

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The geese of Growmore

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Why does a gay guy come out of the closet? He can't see anything inside.

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What's worse than a baby in a car accident? The baby survives and has a mental problem, grows up, and then drives the same car and gets in another accident.

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Three men are walking on a beach when they find a lamp. They rub it, and a genie comes out. It tells them that they each get one wish, and to choose wisely. They each decide to discuss what to wish for with their wives. Their wives take them to a local hospital, where they receive treatment for hallucinations.

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A woman had a dream. She followed this dream and completed all the goals she had set in life and was excessively happy. Then she woke up and her original suspicions were confirmed...it was a dream.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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