Justin Bieber walked into a strip club. Selena Gomez wasn't there.

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What did the man with AIDS say to the other man? I have AIDS and will most likely succumb to the disease.

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When an intellectual was told by someone, "Your beard is now coming in," he went to the rear entrance and waited for it. Another intellectual asked what he was doing. Once he heard the whole story, he said: "I'm not surprised that people say we lack common sense. How do you know that it's not coming in by the other gate?"

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Your friend is so blonde that when she was born she had no hair but overtime it grew out and became blonde.

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What do you call a black guy who works at McDonald's? A worker, you racist piece of shit!

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Q: How do you stop a black man from drowning? A: Quit peeing in his mouth.

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What did the priest say to the kid? You can tell your dog but nobody else, ok?

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What's the difference between the sky and the ocean? They're both blue

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What's the best part about having sex with a 9 year old in the shower? Pedophilia is a crime, and the people that do it are very sick individuals. The fact that you even thought there was a 'best' part disgusts me.

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Why couldn't the girl find a date to the prom? Because she was really, really ugly.

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In soviet Russia...things are different

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Why did the black man sleep all day? He suffered from narcolepsy.

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Why was't the Elephant allowed on the Airplane? He didn't have a boarding pass

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what just happened when chuck norris falling from the sky..? Starts making a wish

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What did Santa call the prostitute? Nothing. Santa isn't real.

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What would you call Martin Luther King Jr. If he was alive today? Alive

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Quack Quack Quack Quack Quack Quack Pi pi pi pi Pi pi pi pi Pingu Pingu!

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A horse, a duck, a pig, and a mus lim walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the mus lim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in Chicago. The bartender reminds the mus lim that he's keeping company with a swine, and the mus lim feels offense for the poor horse.

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A man walked into a bar. He has been in a coma for six weeks now.

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What do you call a muffin with frosting? A cupcake

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Jingle bells, jingle bells SHIT MY FOOT

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what is big, grey and sits in the middle of a field. A filing cabinet

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A guy walks into a bar. He has a couple beers, gets in his car and goes home. He got arrested on the way because it is illegal to drink and drive.

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A man is working at a bar. He feels a fly graze his left index finger, which has become a bit sweaty. The man rubs the finger for a moment, then continues to slice grapes for a customers synthetic japanese glue farm.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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