Why couldn't Jimmy ride his bike? His family had to sell it in order to put food on the table

Why is the sky blue? As the light from our Sun shines into the atmosphere, most of the colors are able to reach the Earth’s surface uninterrupted. However, because blue light has a wavelength that is the same size as the particulates in the air, this light is scattered in every direction. This blue light bounces from particulate to particulate until it eventually reaches your eyes. For this reason, no matter what direction you look in the sky, it appears to be blue. This blue light originated with the Sun, was bounced around in the sky many times, and then eventually reached your eyes.

Q: how do you stop a baby's crying keeping you up at night A: pull out it's wind pipe

Why was the Jew evicted from his home? He forgot to pay the rent

When is a door not a door? Never. a door is always a door. it cannot be anything else.

Why did the kid lose his nose? because his brother chopped it off with an axe.

Whats brown and sticky? Shit.

What's funnier than killing a bunch of orphans? Pretty much anything is funnier than that. What's wrong with you?

What is the difference between a bike and a baby? There are a lot of differences

Why did the blonde laugh at the funeral? She suffers from autism, and doesn't understand when it isn't appropriate laugh. The mourners at the funeral, understanding this problem, ignored her and carried on with the service.

Misner is a twat.

Two peanuts walk down the street. One was a salted.

What do you call 6 dead people on your front lawn? A mass murder

Person 1: Knock Knock Person 1: Who's there Person 1: me me you who you me you who me you no me (say super dooper quickly)

Why did the chicken cross the mobia strip? To get to the same side!

"It's A Bird!!!" "It's A Plane!!!" "No, It's not either of those things."

What's worse than finding out your friend is gay? Being gang-raped.

Why was the horse sad? Because it seen a Tesco van in the distance.

What kind of Juice do White supremacists Hate the most? Minute Maid.

What's the difference between a turtle and a bird? They both fly. Except the turtle.

What's purple and in my hand? Nothing i was lying about the purple

What's worse than finding a bug in your soup? The Holocaust

There was once a boy who ate fire. He died of severe burns.

how many black people does it take to complete the simplest task such as washing their own hair? A shitload! thats why slavery was so populer back in the day. (and gays were big then to because they had to shower together to remember to wash their hair.)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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