What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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Whats worse that a rhino hitting you in the face? A rhino with horns hitting you in the face

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A Chinese man and an american lived together. The Chinese man said to the american man, "I'm going to walk the dog." The American said "OK." Later that night they were eating dinner. The American said to the Chinese man, "I don't think that I've had this meat before. What is it?" The Chinese man replied, "The dog." The American, surprised, spewed out the food he was eating. "THE DOG!?" he yelled, shocked. The Chinese man replied, "Yes, I TOLD you I was going to wok the dog!"

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yo mamas so poor she should probably consider finding a job

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What do you call a person with no eyes? Blind.

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What does a boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Me:Oh wait, I got a joke! Friends:Oh boy, what is it? Tell us! Me:..my grandma died.. *Everyones silent* Some random guy:Oh haha, I get it! Me:Shut up, you have no friends. Some random guy: Oh........

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Why was he arrested? He broke the law.

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Humpdy dumpty sat on a wall and enjoyed his day off

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What did the pirate say when his parrot died? Nothing. They both died at the same time in a horrible shipwreck. There were no survivors.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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What did the octopus say to the lion? Nothing, because the likely hood of a lion and an octopus meeting is incredibly slim, as an octopus is a sea creature, and a lion isn't. A lion and an octopus cant even communicate with each other anyway, so even if they did come across each other they wouldn’t be able to talk. Octopi are also anti-social creatures by nature so I can say with some confidence that the lion and the octopus will not have a convocation. Written By JAMES!

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What did one dinosaur say to the other? Nothing and if you think dinosaurs talk you might need to be diagnosed for having Schizophrenia. Invega is a subtle treatment.

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Q:how do you save a black guy from drowning A: you shoot him

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Your doctor, You've been diagnosed with venereal disease.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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A woman walks into a bar. She is pregnant and gives her baby fetal alcohol syndrome.

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What do you do when a girl you gave roofies to wakes up? Take your tongue out of her ass and run!

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whats long, hard, and full of semen? A submarine

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What happens when you take a break from reality? Nothing, it's impossible, unless you live in a virtual world.

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What happened to my sunglasses?

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what do you call a tall skiny kid with a very big ego autistic.........colby schluter.

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What is white black and Chinese A panda

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Jessica walks into a bar jokes jessica cant walk

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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