why didn't santa deliver any presents this christmas? Because he isn't real

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Why did the man say how was your day? because it was the end of the day

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Q why did the kids make fun of timmy A because he was an android with al chunk of metal added accidentally where a real boys crotch would be. Bwilkster

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Did You Hear About That Mexican Who Went To College? no. Well plenty of them go to college every day. thats good to know.

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Boy: Mum... I got a hundred marks! Mother: That's good my son! Which subject was it? Boy: 30 for maths, 40 for english, and 30 for science.

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What's worse than missing your flight? Realizing that everyone who got on it died from a bomb

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What's the difference between a duck?

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What did god say when he made the first african american? "I got about 3 more humans to go and about 400,000,000 more insects and plants"..

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What did the biker do when he heard about Kony 2012? He became a social activist and did his part by contributing to the cause.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer procrastinated fixing the latch on the coop. Did his wife warn him this would happen? Yessss! Did he listen? Noooo!

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An old man, and his daughter are walking down the street. They are having a nice time, until the daughter turns around to see the old man lying on the ground in pain because of the crippling arthritis in his back that has caused him agony and discomfort for years.

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Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. "Yes" is the answer.

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one time when i bought a sonic blast they gave me a regular? size spoon and i was like this is a huge inconvenience.

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bees knees

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what is the difference between coke and pepsi? -they are competing soft drinks made by different brands

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A giraffe walks into a bar.... just kidding, a giraffe wouldnt fit in a bar.

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what did one wall say to the other wall Nothing because its physically impossible for walls to talk

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What's Green and has Wheels? Ian Leighton... I LIED ABOUT THE GREEN

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whats long and green? weed

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why did the irishman leave the bar he had to go to his sons birthday party

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf, dumb, and blind.

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What do you get when you mix a fox and a sloth? a..FOTH

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? He has retinopathy of prematurity and was born blind.

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What was Dillon's old name? Dillon, I lied about the old name part.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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