Patty cake. Which was a pretty funny catchthingie.

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How many TV shows are there? A lot.

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Your mom is so poor that she can't even pay attention.

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What is 9 inches long, the same colour as my skin, and makes my girlfriend gag when I shove it down her throat? Her Miscarriage.

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What does Santa and a grape have in common? They're both purple, except Santa.

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What did Helen Keller's parents do when they were displeased with her behavior? They beat the shit out of her.

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I like big butts and I cannot lie. You don't know that. I may enjoy skinny butts. I may be lying.

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What do you call a large group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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What did the black man say to the policeman? "Take it easy."

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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A duck flies into a bar. The bartender allows it to stay because it turns into a beautiful swan. The goose then lays a golden egg and the bartender stares in awe as a giant bean stalk grows out of the egg. He's ecstatic and really glad he let the flamingo stay with all the wonderful colors and magic going on.

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Is that a threat or a promise? dragonflies

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Why where the 3 little children talking about muffins? Because muffins are smart.

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who are the worlds fastest readers? the people who jumped on 911 cause they read 48 stories in 10 seconds

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Knock knock! Who's there? Bob Hi bob, come inside. And next time just use the doorbell

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What do you call a guy with a rainbow tuxedo on? A classy man that is very well dressed

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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Bradley is Sexi;P just kidding!!! fatty

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Why did Steven Hawking walk into a bar? He didn't he can't walk

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What did the UPS man bring Sara? a box. whats inside it is only Sara's buisness

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Shush girl, shut your lips do the Helen Keller and advocate the rights the disabled.

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How does a black man have sex? He inserts his penis into his partners vagina, then slides it out, then inserts it back in, and repeats this motion untill he has reached his climax and ejaculates!

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A man walks into a bar, purchases a beer, and leaves.

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A Jew was walking home one night when two thugs leapt out of the darkness and demanded his money and other possessions at gunpoint. A reflection of how dangerous our streets can be at night.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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