Your mom is so poor she can't afford to buy herself nice things.

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Who is the greatest cook ever? Adolof Hitler

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hi

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Q:What's red and fluffy? A: A blue rock, if blue were red and rocks were fluffy

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How do you get an elephant into a freezer? You stuff him in there!!

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How do you kill Osama Bin Laden? Get The Navy Seals To Infiltrate his compound.

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An Indian lady is pushing her child down a footpath in a stroller whilst leading her dog. A refridgerator lands on the mother. Why did the Chinese man behind her cry? Because loss of life is a frantic event and having witnessed such an event he was deeply shocked. He was also sad that no dogs were killed. This is because a dog killed his wife in a freak accident and he has held a grudge against the species ever since.

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five gay guys stand in a line is it a straight line

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it can.

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Why can cats jump so high? Cats leg muscles are different then ours. They work kind of like springs that build up energy and then release suddenly. Its kind of like a budgie cord. This gives them the ability to jump so high. If humans were built the same way, they could easily jump up on a one-story roof.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a paranoid schizophrenic And so am I

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what do you call a white and black girl 69? ying yang

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A black man walks into a bank with a gun......he is a 25-year veteran SWAT team officer attempting to arrest two armed robbers that have 5 old ladies hostage.

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Your momma is so fat, she doesn't have a birthday. She has a birthweek.

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Excuse me sir, you wouldn't happen to have the time, would you?

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Do you know what's funny about the holocaust? Nothing, it was an unspeakably evil act by a deranged man who should never have been given the power to command a nation

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An owl turns to the other owl. He has to, he can't move his eyes.

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What did one duck say to the other? "Quack!"

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What do an apple and a banana have in common? They are both not cookies

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There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

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What's black and white and red all over? A penguin inside a blender.

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What Did The Kid With No Arms And No Legs Get For His Birthday? A Walking Stick

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The duck says do you smell poop. Ya says the chicken, it wasn't me It was the turkey

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Things to do get an A on my test win my hockey game become immortal well that escalated quickly

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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