You throw nothing like your mother; she is actually really good at throwing.

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Q: Why did the blonde stare at the can of frozen orange juice for two hours? A: Because she was dead.

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A jew walks into an Oven....

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Whats the difference between a lemon and an ant? They're both yellow except for the lemon.

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a preist sees a rabbi on the street while taking a walk. he says hi and proceeds to have a nice conversation as they are good friends despite their religous differences

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(402)217-6102 that is Jesse

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Why was the boy crying? Because his parents were in a car crash and died and his grandparents were already dead and he got cancer for christmas. And he had no testicles

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how do you make a joke act like yourself

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Knock Knock I don't have a door. I'm Homeless

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How do you make a plumer sad? You kill his children.

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goats are like mushrooms, if you shoot a duck, im scared of toasters

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why did the students in 7/8 red try to commit suicide? they had miss harding as a teacher!

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Q. What language cant you speak A.Sign language

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Why did the elephant paint his toenails orange? Because he wanted to hide in the pumpkin patch

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What do you call a pig that just took a bath? Clean!

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How do you put a giraffe in a refrigerator? You open the door, put the giraffe in and close the door. How do you put an elephant in a refrigerator?. . . . . . No! You open the door, TAKE THE GIRAFFE OUT, and put the elephant in. So, the lion calls a meating in the animal kingdom and who's not there? The elephant, he's in the refrigerator. You have to cross a river infested with crocodiles, and you don't have a boat. How do you get across?. . . . . . No! You get in the river and swim across because the crocodiles are at the meating with the lion!

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Women's Rights Movement

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why did the mexican cross the road? to catch its bus on the other side

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I always like to pack a second pair of pants, because if there's one thing my mother ever said to me it was 'please, I'm begging you - don't put me in a home.'

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What do you call a deer with only one leg? A one legged deer. What do you call a deer with one leg, one eye and lives in Rome? Still a one legged deer.

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Three Jews walk into a bar. One says something to the other two, but it was in Yiddish, and I don't speak that, so I don't know what he said, but all of them laughed really hard, so it must have been funny.

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How many dead babies can fit in a dead horse 11

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What's big and hairy my penis just kidding It's Bigfoot

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How do you stop the neighbors from calling the police when you play your music too loud? Kill them and use their bodies as noise insulation

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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