Q: What did the blind boy get for his birthday? A: He doesn't know

thumb_up thumb_down +8

roses are red unless they are the pink ones oh yeah they're also pretty expensive

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How do you drown a black man? You refuse to help him due to your pride and therefore you are no longer a decent member of society.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Steve Jobs Died today. So did 56 million other people.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up on its own? The kickstand was broken and the child whom of which owned the bicycle no longer had the need for training wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the child get cancer? Because there was a family history of it.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What do 10 dead babies in a blender sound like? Idk because I was too busy masturbating.

thumb_up thumb_down

roses are red,violets,are green who tf shit in the toilet?

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the plane crash? Because its pilot was a loaf of bread

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Whats fast, dead and make of CGI. Paul Walker

thumb_up thumb_down +22

And then i said what about breakfast at tiffanies, and then you said i hate that movie.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

how do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it's face

thumb_up thumb_down +4

abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A. Knock Knock B. ... A. Knock Knock B. ... A. DING DONG B. Who's there? A. Me, I tried knocking first but you musn't have heard me, so I rang the doorbell.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why was 8 afraid of 9? Because 9 bullied him until he became anorexic.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

You had 10 bricks on an airplane, you throw one. How many do you now have? 9. How do you get the elephant in the fridge? Open the fridge put the elephant in. How do you get the giraffe in the fridge? Open the fridge, take the elephant out, put the giraffe in. There was an animal meeting, all animals were invited. Which animal was missing? The giraffe, because he's still in the fridge. An old woman wants to cross a river that was full of crocodiles. How does she cross without getting eaten? The crocodiles were at the animal meeting, so she got across safely. She dies anyways. What happened? She was hit by the brick.

thumb_up thumb_down

How many pancakes does it take to fill up a doghouse? None, because ice cream doesn't have bones.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the fish say when he ran into a wall underwater? dam

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Friends are like trees. They fall when hit multiple times with an axe.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Whats black and white and red / read all over * a bloody penquin * nun falling down the slairs * news paper * a clumsey panda

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Hey, I just met you... No, I'm your brother. You've known me for 30 years. You must have memory loss.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did I post a joke on this website? Because I felt like it.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you call 2 Mexicans playing baseball? It depends on what the name of each individual is.

thumb_up thumb_down +593

Larry The Cableguy....thats it.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops