What did the dog say to the house? Roof

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What's worse than having a FUPA? The Holocaust

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What do you call a Mexican that is jumping off a building? A suicidal jumper!

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Roses are brown, Violets are brown, Who shit in my garden?

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Q - What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and a trampoline? A - I take my shoes off when I jump on a trampoline.

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How did Bush really get into the White House? The front door.

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A black man is picking cotton in a southern white mans field. This is because the white man is paying a more than fair wage and the black man is a 3rd generation cotton picker who enjoys taking part in his heritage.

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Why are there no more monkeys jumping on the bed? I shot them all.

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richard is fag

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Why did the black man die? He was shot

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What's black and white and red all over? An interracial couple in a car crash.

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Why did the chIcken cross the road? To escape the holocaust.

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How many Neurons does a bug have? - - - - - -- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -- - - - - - -- - - - -- - - - - - -It's true

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Ass

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What do you do i a stranger offers you candy? Make sure its not stale then jump in his van.

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What is a slave fighting in a pit of Rome? Just a slave. Who cares?

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There was once a Polish man who was extremely sad with life because people always made fun of him. He decided to do something about it. He sat down to contemplate the situation, and after a few hours, he thought, "I have never seen anyone making fun of Italians. So, if I start talking and behaving like them, no one will be able to make out that I am Polish and make fun of me." He went into isolation for three months and after a lot of practice, he walked confidently into a shop and said, "I am a very hungry. Give me some pepperoni and zucchini." Immediately, the man behind the counter said "Are you Polish?" This guy was taken aback and he repeated his request. The man behind the counter said, "Are you Polish or not?" This man was finally very ashamed and amazed at the shop owner's discerning ability and so he admitted to the fact after which he asked, "But how did you know?" The shopkeeper replied, "My grandmother was Polish. I could tell by your accent."

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Why can't vegetarians eat mushrooms because I can't urinate over a scotch bonnet :/

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Yo mama is so fat that her doctor advised her to get some exercise or risk developing a heart condition!

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What would an ice hockey player do if the ice melted? Walk off, as the ice is only 3/4 of an inch thick.

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What is green and red all over? A christmas tree that is internally bleading.

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Why can't girls count to seventy? Trick question. Clinical research has proven that a fair amount of girls are, in fact, capable of counting from one to seventy using ordinal numbers in the Arabic numeral system.

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If anyone has a KIK, put it in the comments.

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Roses are Gray, Violets are Gray, I am a dog.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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