Want to hear a funny joke? Womens rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Where did Sally go during the explosion? Everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

It was the week of the school formal and a girl rang up her date and said I don't have a dress for the formal. He said ok the lets go out and buy one. So they went to the dress shop to buy one but the line was really, really long so they waited in the dress line for ages and ages until they finally got to the front, paid and walked out. As they did, the girl said well I suppose you need a suit, so they went to the suit shop, and again, the suit line was really long but they waited in the suit line and they finally got to the front, paid and walked out. Then the guy said, well if we want to go to the formal in style, then we will need a limo. So they went to the limo shop but the limo line was really long as well. But again, they waited in the limo line and they got to the front, paid and left. It was finally the night of the formal, she had her dress, he had his suit and they arrived in their limo. Everyone was having a great time and the the girl said to her partner, I'm a bit thirsty could you please get me a drink? So the guy went over to the drinks table and went to get a glass of punch but there was no punch line.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Who took the last can of soda? I dunno.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's the worse part about a Jewish man dying in a house fire? It was his birthday

thumb_up thumb_down +52

An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Friends are like balloons.. If you stab them they die.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

what sucks? things that suck

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Josh Groban, John Mayer, Ben Folds and Nick Cave are at an underground club that specialises in lithuanian folk music and siberian vodka. end of story

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A racist guy walks into a bar. Gets drunk, and cracks jokes. Then proceeds to get the shit kicked out of him.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Where did Adolf go as a vacation after the war? Hell

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what just happened when chuck norris falling from the sky..? Starts making a wish

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A man walked into a bar, was surprised to find his wife with another man, and had a heart attack.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A woman comes home and finds her husband with another woman. Their marriage collapses and the husband goes on to marry the other woman and his ex-wife commits suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

what did helen keller say to the nazi? -nothing, helen keller was blind and deaf so she could never aquired the ability to speak

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a Muslim driving a plane? You don't drive a plane.

thumb_up thumb_down +107

Why didnt the poor black man have cell phone service? Because seven eight nine.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

* two sisters are making yo mama jokes* * mom turns around* mom: Hey yo mama so stupid ... sister one: ummmm.... sister two: sure thats not you?

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why was the man worried? because he had a shotgun up his ass

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How Does My cat have Sex? With Me.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you get when you cross sodium citrate, citric acid, benzyl alcohol, monoethanolamine, sodium benzoate, gylcol disterate, FD&C Yellow #5, ammonium lauryl sulfate, methylisothiazolinone, fragrances/perfumes, FD&C Blue #1, sodium chloride, zinc pyrithione, methylchloroisothiazolinone, ammonium xylenesulfonate, ammonium laureth sulfate, cetyl alcohol, cocamide, guar hydropropyltrimonium chloride, 1-Decene, homopolymer, hydrogenated, trimethylolpropane tricaprylate and water? Head & Shoulders Dandruff Shampoo for Fine-Oily Hair

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How do you piss off a gypsy? Curse at him

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Your mum is so ugly that i make jokes about how ugly she is

thumb_up thumb_down +6

While out looking for sex last week I met a hooker who looked like a rhino. I said to her, "Do you charge?" She said, "Sir, I am arresting you under the Street Offences Act 1959. You do not have to say anything. But it may harm your defence if you do not mention when questioned something which you later rely on in court."

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops