everybody loves raymond

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A man is watching a football game and sees a comercial for a medicine that boosts testosterone levels. However, this man has no issues with his testosterone levels, so he proceeds to watch the rest of the game and then goes to bed.

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One Direction has 12 letters. So does gayyyyyyyyyy. Coincidence? I think not.

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Why did the baby die, because he got herpes, so did his mother, there both dead now.

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This is my first attempt at making an anti-joke: That's was it.

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Whats is worse than a dog bite? A shark bite. Whats worse than a shark bite? The Holocaust.

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Person 1: Knock knock Person 2: Whose there? Person 1: Frank Person 2: Oh, hey man. Come on in.

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Why was the blonde crying? Because she just watched her infant get sucked into a jet engine and she was very sad.

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why was the blind man walking in circles? i dont know ask him yourself.

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Susan went to Chemistry class, Susan is no more. For what she thought was H20 was H2S04 (sulfuric acid.)

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Why isnt there a womens NASCAR? Because NASCAR does not yet have the funding to start a women's league.

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Bill: Knock, Knock. Sean: Who's there? Bill: It's your neighbor, Bill Walters, from across the street. Sean: Oh, hey Bill, how are you and Margie? Bill: Oh, I'm doing fine, but Margie just got out of the hospital for a broken arm. Sean: My gosh, what happened. Bill: She was just loading the Halloween decorations down from the attic while I wasn't home and fell. She's fine though; it was only a minor fracture. Sean: Well thank goodness she alright. Bill: Anyway, I came over to return those hedge clippers I borrowed from you last month. Sean: Oh, thank you. How did they work? Bill: Just great once I gave them a coat of oil. It was a big job... I haven't trimmed those bushes in three years. Sean: No problem, I almost never use them myself. Well I better get back to Jeanie...I'm helping her make dinner. Bill: Alright, Well thanks again.

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What happens when you murder someone? The Government murders you.

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Why is the sky blue? The sun reflects off the water molecules in all bodies of water

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what do you get when you cross a rhino and a chicken? well, if you're unlucky and too close too the chicken, salmonella if you provoke the rhino, impaled

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what does a gay horse eat heeyyyyy

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"One fish, two fish, red fish, the holocost." -Dr. Seuss

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What did the Jew say to the other Jew? Found a penny the other day....

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Roses are red violets are next thing you know my D*** is in you

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What did the blind, deaf and dumb lady name her kid? Sebastion.

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a man walks into a bar after a long day at work, and asks for a drink. he finishes, pays the bill and leaves a handsome tip for the bartender and heads home.

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Why did the little boy cry? His entire family was shot and killed at his elementary school play.

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How can you tell if a blonde has been using your computer? Ask her.

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My Japanese girlfriend left me the other day... I am now depressed and have resorted to comfort eating.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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