Harry thrust his wand forward, "Expelliarmus!" Voldemort casually ducks, and fires a killing curse at our hero.

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What's the difference between Michael Jackson and an astronaut? One walks on the moon and the other has sex with little boys.

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A man with a badly injured arm is sitting in a hospital. He says, "Doctor, when my arm heals, will I be able to play the violin?" The doctor says, "With proper medical attention and rest, yes, you will be able to." The man says, "That's great! Before I was hurt, I really enjoyed playing the violin."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he has two legs

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i am in sex mode, why the F**k are you!!

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Whats brown, large, thick, and sticky? a stick

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When Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked the world, He broke his foot because every human being that kicks such a solid structure would break their foot.

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What happened to Alice? She fell down a big hole and broke her neck.

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what did the n i g g e r with alzheimers say to the c h i n k? 9/11 was the funniest fake joke since the holocaust and 9/11 and the holocaust and 9/11... and... what?

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What do u call a bunch of black dudes burried from their necks down? Afro-turf

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Whats funny about alexis? she's really a boy!

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why did the black man go to jail why he raped your mom

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what did the chickpea say to the raison when he got called big but? Atleast i dont have a stick up my but.

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"Bitches are fake, talk shit get hit!". False, female dogs cannot speak in the tongues of humans, and if they could I am sure excrement would not come from their mouths.

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Two monkeys are lying in a tree. Big monkey and little monkey, little monkey bites the big monkey's tale, big monkey starts jumping around the place shouting. Little monkey just starts laughing and takes another sip of whiskey.

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GADZOOKS!

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Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because its head is so far away from its shoulders.

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When does the Narwhal bacon? The Narwhal bacons at mid-night.

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so a horse walks into a bar and the bartender syas why the long face and the horse says naaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah.

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knock knock who's there i lost my wallet my nan died

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What do you call a rich black man? A auntrapanour who simply enjoys making more money than any average person

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What Do You Call a Hawk in Virginia? A Hawk What Do you Call a Hawk that lives in Virginia? Virgian Hawk

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Goats are like mushrooms. If you shoot a duck, I'm afraid of toasters.

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What do you get when you combine a potato and an apple? A nice Apple Potato Souffle...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops