What do call something that looks exactly like a turtle but is not a turtle? A picture of a turtle

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A man walks into a bar. He pulls out a knife, shoots the bar tender, and then kills himself.

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What does a black car thief do with a stolen car? Drive it

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What is Jason? Black.

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Why does Charlie Sheen do cocaine? Because his father was a poor role model and he's an unstable celebrity.

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What did the black guy do to his neighbor's car while he was away? Wash it for a for as a favor.

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MURRRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? Two in the front, three in the back, and 278 in the ash tray/\.

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I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis. -Rivrawr

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Q: What's green and has four wheels? A: A green car.

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why did the man beat his wife because he was mean

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Cancer.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. ( to heaven )

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why do elephants eat peanuts? so they can save the wrappers for valuble prizes.

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Two friends are sitting on a couch watching TV. One friend accidently turned on a pornography channel. The other friend felt awkward and went home.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Less than you cuz your fat.

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What did the penguin say to the other penguin? Nothing, penguins don't talk.

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Why are you reading anti-jokes? ... why are you looking at me like that? I asked you a question, idiot.

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Given the unlikely circumstance in which an elephant actually does sit on your fence, it is equally unlikely said elephant would be able to do so unseen by witnesses, of whom you may ask what time the event occurred. Assuming your witness thought to look at the time befor calling animal control.

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Q. What is black and nobody cares when they step on it? A. Asphalt

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What is the difference between green and desert sage? About 20 bucks a gallon.

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AYE DEAD ON CAOIMHIN

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I hate it when i don't forward an email and then i die the next day.

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how much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? 7

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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