why didn't the baby cry once it came out of the womb? because it was a stillborn.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's even better than finding 10 bucks in your pocket? Getting into heaven.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

How do you make time fly? You throw a clock out a window.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? were both lawyer's.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What is the difference between a boyscout and a Jew? Boys outs come home from camp.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

What's the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? When I see a Porsche on the street, I think to myself, "that's a nice car," but when I see a pile of dead babies on the street I scream, "OH DEAR GOD WHY?!?! WHY?!?! WHERE IS THE MONSTER THAT KILLED THESE POOR BABIES?!?!" I then quickly alert the authorities of the hideous crime before vomiting profusely and crying until my tear ducts run dry. I sustain irreversible psychological damage and the image of hundreds of cruelly murdered infants prevents me from sleeping at night.

thumb_up thumb_down +1,848

2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the lady drop her shopping Because she ran into coles

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How do you make a blond shut up? Staple her tongue to the roof of her mouth and super-glue her lips together.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A black man walks into a bar. No comments were said to him for everyone else was paying attention to their other peers.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

whats worse than loseing your dog? getting raped by a clown.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Knock knock, "Whos there" a business man who wants to sell you things that you don't need "Oh, go away"

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What is the only non-racist animal? The mexican panda. Why? It's black, white, hispanic, and asian.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did a black kid kill his teacher? No reason. That what they do

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Thats what she said

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's the difference between peanut butter and jam? Peanut butter is a food paste made primarily from dry roasted peanuts, while jam is a product made with whole fruit, that is cut into pieces or crushed.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

How do you get 100 babies into a bucket? With a blender. How do you get them out again? With Doritos.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why is it hard to see a black man in the night? Because its dark out, and he's BLACK.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Want to hear a tough toung twister? spoons

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Everyone believes in something. If you believe "you'll have another drink," you may be an alcoholic.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Your mamma's such a whore, she sleeps with men who pay her.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the turkey was in the oven and all the farm animals thought the chicken could run the errands in his place just fine.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A horse walks into a bar the bartender says to the horse y the long face the horse is unable to speak English, shits on the floor than leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A black walks into a Kentucky Fried Chicken. He was a customer.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops