what did batman tell robin before they got into the batmobile? -let's get in the batmobile!

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What do grass and cows have in common? They both say "moo" except for grass

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why did sally fall off the swings she had no arms knock knock whos there not sally

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What's worse than having no coffee at the office? Looking out the window on the 100th floor and seeing the cockpit of a Boeing 767.

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Why couldn't the cat drink its milk? Because its ears were nailed to the floor.

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Do you want icecream, Björn?

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.

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What's the difference between roast soup and pea beef? Nothing because neither of them are physically possible; you can't roast soup and you can't pee beef

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A little boy started choking on a condom. His father came and was in a great panic. "Please don't leave me. I don't want to lose you!" he cried over and over again. Then his wife came in and said "it's alright darling, there's plenty more in the drawer". "Oh, thank God for that, I thought I lost it there!" dad replied.

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A guy with cancer walks into a bar... No one treated him any special way, it's not like he had I have cancer written on his forehead.

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Why wouldn't the girl clean her room? She was paralyzed.

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Why is the blonde so upset? Her mother is dying from cancer.

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What do you get when you rape a dead baby filled with jalapeños? A lifetime in prison, and a burning penis.

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What do you call 1,000 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A horrible boating accident.

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How do chinese people call the firemen? By phone.

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what do you call a baby that's just been crushed by a piano. a mess for a cleaner to deal with. think about his health. after that he might get a disease from the body and he might not get to sleep as it is a haunting sight.

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Boys have swag, real men have class

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Why did the boy fail his test? Because he got shot before he could even study.

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God wrote this joke.................................

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What came first: the chicken or the egg? God.

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Knock, Knock Whos there? Banana Banana Who? Banana i didn't say your moms dead.

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Luke, I am your father... Uh... Okay, thats chill, so uh, is my last name Vader or somthing? No son, my name is Anakin Skyw... NOOOOOOOOOOO THATS IMPOSSIBLE!

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What is worse than mistaking a bottle of blood for ketchup? Mistaking a bottle of "sticky white stuff" for milk... Moral: If you are a straight man that is... As for women meh... lie all you want ladies...

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Why did the baby cross the road? 'cause i kicked it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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