Q:how man ADD kids does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: I dont know, wanna go ride bikes?

thumb_up thumb_down -4

You know what sucks? A vacuum.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why couldn't the man open his car door for the women? He drove a jeep with removable doors

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Your social life.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do u call a black guy with a gun? A police officer u racist bastard

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's harder than nailing seven dead babies to a tree? My erection while doing it.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why are women always wrong? Well, depending on the factors of IQ of said women, location and date, said time period of always can be deemed in every circumstance as incorrect to say the least, and derogatory. These days said derogatory actions are punishable by law.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

When ducks fly in a V formation do you know why one side is longer than the other? Because there are more ducks on that side.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A n antelope walks into a bar and many people leave for the sake of their safety and animal control gets called to escort the antelope out of the bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

So this moose walks into the super-market and asks the lady woman at he counter "Got any potatoes?" Lady woman says "Down Isle 5" So the moose goes down isle 5 and there isn't any potatoes

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A rooster is standing on top of a pointed bird house. He lays an egg. Which side does the egg fall, the left or the right? I don't care, I'm a vegetarian.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

so 3 guys walk into a bar.....the 4th one ducks

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Theres a tomatoe a cucumber and a mouth. HA

thumb_up thumb_down -18

whats green and has wheels? grass i lied about the wheels

thumb_up thumb_down +24

The song Barbra Streisand has more than 2 words.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What is white on the inside and red on the outside? An apple.

thumb_up thumb_down

A man walks into a bar with a monkey. I forgot the rest but you mom is a whore

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Mama Bear and Papa Bear were in court getting a divorce and the judge offered Baby Bear a choice of which parent to live with. "Do you want to live with your mother?" the judge asks. "No! She beats me." answers the baby bear. "OK, then you can live with your father." says the judge. "No! He beats me too!" cries baby bear. So Baby Bear was placed in a foster home.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Roses are red my name is dave this poem makes no bloody sense microwave

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Q: What's the Difference between Judaism and Catholicism? A: There are many substantial and vital distinctions between Judaism and Christianity. Of course, there are many similarities as well, primarily because Christianity emerged from Judaism. However, the emergence was not a direct line. Christianity broke from Judaism, forming a new religion, so it is misleading, however comfortable the thought might be, to believe that the two religions are essentially the same, or to see Christianity as the natural continuation of Judaism.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why did the chicken cross the road? To save his failing marriage.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What is the best part about football The scoring

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops