Why are all black people fast? They aren't. Some of them are slow.

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I had sex with your mom. It was f*cking terrible.

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What is the best way to deal with a broken ankle? Ear Lobes.

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Knock Knock whose there? child abuse...

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Why did the little girl fail her test? She had mental retardation.

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Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They finally get to Florida and they see a sign that says "Disneyworld: left" so they turned around and went home

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Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

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Why didn't the restaurant serve the black man? He hadn't ordered anything.

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Why can't you look at the sun? Because it's 2.00 AM

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What do you get if you cross a lin and a deer? A pile of bloody bones.

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You know what's good for shoulder pain? If you ice on for 20 minutes then off for 20 minutes repetitively three times a day

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If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of progress? Deteriorate

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What kind of drug did the cops catch the alligator with? None. They were going to use a tranquiliser dart, but SPCA intervened and simply held the alligator's mouth shut while they loaded it into a secure cage.

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Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

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A: What does MC Hammer like? B: Big Butts. A: Can he lie? B: No.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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My butt!!!!!!!!

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Your mother is so fat that when she jumps into a pool, she displaces a proportionately larger amount of water than people with normal body mass indexes or BMI

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Why did the pilot crash the plane? Because it wasn't a pilot it was a toaster.

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Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Seeing your mom dance

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What did the headless man say? Nothing. The man can't speak because he doesn't have a head.

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whats worse than finding a dead cat in your kitchen? a dead cat in your bedroom

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A man walks into a bar. He I then taken to the hospital for a major head injury.

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How do you make the queen of england cry? You rape her violently.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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