roses are red violets are blue i take pleasure in the simple things in life as i have nothing else left to live for

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Why did the dead baby cross the road? Cause it was stapled to the chicken.

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Q: What has four eyes but can't see? A: A blind guy with glasses

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Not doing your Webtime on a Friday!!

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I used to work at a chemical plant manufacturing hydrochloric acid. I couldn't handle it. One day a container exploded and I got severe chemical burns on my face. The scarring is awful. It has ruined my life.

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A christian, a Jew, and a muslim walk into a bar. They order their drinks and have a good night because no one knows they are all of different religions.

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What do you get when you cross a train track and a bumpy feild, Further along on your GPS map.

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Yo momma's so fat she ate Sally's arms. Knock Knock Who's There. The police we have a warrant for your mothers arrest on charges of cannibalism and kidnapping.

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Dad: i hate you. dads son:(kills him self)

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An Irishman walks out of a bar.

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Whats white and looks like a bunny? a rabbit

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What is smelly and sticky A poo

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Q.Why did Beethoven kill his chicken? A. It had contracted a serious illness. He had killed it as an act of mercy.

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Knock knock Whos there? D D who D's nuts!

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So this guy tells me he hasn't had a bite in weeks. So i bought him lunch.

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What do you call a gardener in Mexico? Un Jardinero.

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What did the bat say to the human? Nothing because bats make too high of frequency noises for humans to understand

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What did the duck wear to go swimming? A bathingsuit!

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What's black and bleeding? Who cares?

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Why couldn't Spiderman pay his rent? He didn't have enough money.

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What was the beauty pageant contestant with a bladder control problem told by the judges? You’re an 8.

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-What do you get when you graph the division of x by the square root of 69? - I don't know, what? -I was asking you, as my family's low economic status hinders my ability to buy a graphing calculator.

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What do you call 5 black people being killed in a car crash? A terrible incident

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Why did the chicken sneeze? Because someone put pepper on its nose.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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