Why wasn't the old woman sitting on the porch? Because she got raped by a big scorpian.

roses are red violets are blue we're having sex cause i'm stronger than you

So, Elvis walks into a bathroom...

why did the chicken eat chicken noodle soup? Because he killed his brother.

Why did Johnny throw his money on the floor? Because he was giving it to charity

a lady says, " i cant stand this." Th guy next to her had his legs blown off and will never be able to stand again.

What is that smell? I don't know. I'm color blind.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple. finding half of regis philbin in your apple...

Q: how do you catch a bear? A: you dig a hole, fill the hole with ashes, surround the hole with peas, and when the bear comes to take a pea kick him in the ash hole

A Black man walks out of a KFC.

A dog walks into a club. Just kidding I hit the dog with a club multiple times, killed it, and went to jail for the murder of an innocent animal.

Whats better than throwing a baby off a building? Catching it with a pitchfork.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He has to on his commute to work. He is a taxpaying citizen who does his 8-5 job to try and cut out a decent living for his wife and kids, so stop questioning the route that he takes to get to work.

Dave: Hey, Doug! How was your day? Doug: My mother is dead.

69 :) 3====D:). [{}]:)

knock knock. who's there? your neighbor. o hi come one in!

What is the same about a Duck and a Pickle? Neither of them can ride a bike.

What did the blind man say to the mentally challenged man when he bumped into him? Watch where you're going, retard.

What did the fat man say to everyone? Hey everyone! I am i fat man!

a jerk that i knew was in a bar. he was about to drive home. at first i tried to stop him until he was sober. instead he punched me in the face. then i dared him to drive home as fast as possible. he died that night... i texted him all the way...

I FEEL LIKE I'M RIDING ON A CLOUD actually it's physically impossible to ride on clouds because they are sparsely situated ice particles.

Why is Jesus not real? Because Chuck Norris is still alive.

What is computers and smells like thin and fragile? dyslexic nipples.

What did one dog say to the other dog? Bark.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...