What do you call a dead child? The product of a car crash

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Stolen

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What do you call a snake with no arms? Normal. What do you call an amphibian with no arms? A caecilian. What do you call a girl with no arms? A poor, poor soul that is unfortunate enough to have had an amputation when young. Now, she can't go in public without being stared at. She can't catch herself when she trips. She can't ride a bike, bake cookies for her family, or be a NASA astronaut like she always dreamed. She is the normal ASDF Movie character.

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Oooh. That fish smells delicious.

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I was walking down the street and a guy fell down right next to me. He woke up a hour later and asked "what smells like year old cat pee?" I said "year old cat pee retard honestly." Then he died. Morale don't ask questions you don't want to know the answers to.

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What did the English teacher write on a sheet of assignment criteria? The assignment criteria. Plus, she spelled "millennium" wrong.

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josh Roberts you speccy CUNT

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To Daniel You must have been born on a highway cuz thats where most accidents happen

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what did the blue paint say to the red paint? i am blue

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Why did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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Why is Islam the fastest growing religion? Because black people breed like rats.

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If George Washington was the first president, and Barack Obama is the latest, how old is my grandma?

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What's blue and smells like sky? Sky

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Q: What do you call a room full of black people? A: A Social Gathering.

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#So tell me what you want, what you really really want, so tell me what you want, what you really really want.# OhOk then. I'll take that photo of your mother.

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Ring Ring! Hello? Hello, is your refrigerator running? Yes it is Good.

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42, that is all

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911 jokes are just plane wrong

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Why didn't Megan do her homework? Although Megan was an intelligent girl who had always done well academically, she remained unconvinced that anything taught in school held practical or philosophical importance.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? I am.

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a drumset fell off a clif. Badoom ch.

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Roses re red Violets are black You'd look better with a knife in your back

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why does jake have so many guns? hes compensating

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heyy emit chase wazzup

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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