What did the big chimney say to the smaller chimney? Nothing chimneys don't talk

A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

What's the difference between Obama and a monkey? They are two different species, so thus they are very different.

How do you make a chicken fly? Throw it

If no means yes and yes means no, what is yes? Yes

Why didn't Johns book get published? He had dyslexia.

Why did Romney loose the election? Because Obama had more votes

Why was the cancer patient in the hospital? Her mother threw a rock at her head.

what's 2 + 2? i don't know that's why i'm asking you

How do u get Hitler out of a car? You open the door.

What'd the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Just Dance 2 the video game

NEVER

What did dean carmon say to his brother? - I don't know I'm not his brother

How many vampires does it take to change a lightbulb. None, Vampires do not exist

a man walks into a bar he is promtly escorted out due to the fact that he wanted to kill the bars owner. The man got life in prison with no chance of parole. This mans name was Michael Myers.

Marrage s like a card game. You start off with 2 hearts and 1 diamond. You end up wishing for a club and a spade!

What do you call an apple in a washing machine? My lunch!

XD A COZY FIGHT XD WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT? I am gonna kick your ass, break your face and then give you a kiss on the cheek as your mangled corpse bleeds out... XD :)) THANKS FOR THE LAUGHTER XD XD Reminds me of a former comment where you describe the local weather, you know, we do not live that far away from each other, hell it was actually the time, we are completely in the same timezone, so anyway, do you also get cartoon network on your television?

What sucks more than being married? Being shot in both kneecaps

Why did the Asian woman drive 20mph on the highway? There was a deadly car accident with many fatalities.

If boobs are round. And so are balls. Then i just cant figure out why the sky is blue?

The way I see it, there are two types of people. Some are female and some a male.

How do you get a dog to stop humping you? Pick him up and suck his dick.

Knock knock. Who's there? I am.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...