Why was the baby crying? Because it was just born and usually a baby cries when its born, if it dosent it usually means something is wrong, so the mother was happy to hear her baby cry.

whats the difference between the same pair of shoes? one shoe is for the left an one if for the right

Yo mama so fat she left the house in high heels and when she came back she had on flip flops. tom halls mum

Why does my friend pick up garbage? Because he is a garbageman.

How do you scare off a ghost? Tell him your ready for a commitment.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A vast quantity of things.

Roses are red Violets are blue I am adopted And so are you

Why did the retarted kids head get stuck in the window? It was a very small window

What happens to the yellow hat when it is thrown into the red sea? It get's wet.

When Chuck Norris runs, he doesn't even move a muscle.

How do you stop a plane? Throw flying birds at it.

Two gays walk into a bar, they are then kicked out by the homophobic owner.

Do you know what's funny? 9/11

What do you call someone who's father is black (born in Kenya), mother is white (born in Canada), and was himself born in Australia? Someone with tri-citizenship

What's green and has wheels? The farmer's tractor.

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

What's scarier than a ghost? Practically anything as ghosts aren't real.

Where did Susie go after an explosion? Everywhere

What do you get when you cross an African, a white person, an Asian and a Spaniard? Society's worst nightmare

My brother found a worm in his apple. I dared him to eat it, so he did. When he tried to swallow, the mashed up worm congealed in his throat, killing him. Later, I found out that the worm had poisonous rectum fluids. I was given the Nobel Peace prize.

Your Mommas so scary slender is afraid of her -_-

Vagina.

what did the Hispanic man say to the black man? hello

what does lady gaga and a vacuum have in common? nothing. lady gaga is a human and the other is a house hold item.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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