I have a crush on my dad.

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How do you find Will Smith in a snowstorm? You look for the black guy.

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The priest, rabbi and Lady Gaga walk into a bar. Lady Gaga performs on stage, while the priest and rabbi listen.

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Q:What did the furry say to the other? A: Probably nothing, cant be easy speaking with a dick in your mouth...

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What did the Doctor say to the patient. You have AIDS The patient took out a machete and stabbed the Doctor. The Doctor died. Two weeks later, the patient died of AIDS.

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What's more fun than a negative pregnancy test? Nothing.

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"An alcohol walks into a man. He is a family and is destroying the bar." Says the drunk man to the bartender who wrote it on Anti-joke.com.

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Q: whats better than having sex? A: nothing

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why did the chicken cross the road? It is impossible to tell because we cannot communicate with chickens, but we can assume there was something of interest over there.

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How do you get a one armed Polish man out of a tree? With a ladder, he needs help.

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A jewish man walks into a bar because he was thirsty.

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Bumsniffer

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A Polish man came home one day from work, hung up his coat, took off his hat and walked into his bedroom shouting "honey I'm home!" What should he see but his best friend in bed with his wife. Infuriated, he rushed to the cupboard, pulled out his gun, put it to his head, pulled the trigger, and died instantly. His children and lecherous wife are forever scarred.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse unable to comprehend english shits on the floor and leaves

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Why did the used car salesman stop selling cars? He got fired.

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What do you call a car with no wheels? Trash

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69!!! (its funny cause i made a referance to 69)

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Your mama's so fat she's going on weight-watchers to pursue a healthier lifestyle and avoid the longterm effects of obesity.

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How can you make a Russian happy? Giving him two tickets for him and his wife to Disneyworld.

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Roses r red violets r blu I hav5 fingers the middle ones for u

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A fat boy walked into a party

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A man throws a penny off of a cliff. He is now one cent poorer

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Q: What do you call a unicorn on a mountain? A: Freaking sick.

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What did the little boy with diabetes get for Christmas? A shot of insulin; just like every other day.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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