If you are stranded on a deserted island would you eat your hand or the 5 star meal you butter prepared? -Matt

thumb_up thumb_down -8

a girl got a friend request from a unknown guy. she chated him asking who he was. he replied vamos a tener sexo caliente y vas a pedir mas rapido mas duro! vamos ser estrellos porno. the girl deleted him as a friend B.A.

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the doctor say to the obese person? You have diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Who let the dogs out? Their owner because he had come to the rational conclusion that they were cooped up in their cage all night and were in serious need of relieving themselves and needed love and affection

thumb_up thumb_down +8

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

thumb_up thumb_down -45

What did 0 say to 8? Nice belt

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's black and white and red all over? A dying zebra.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin getting crushed by a sledgehammer.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had to arms. Knock knock Who's there? Well clearly not Sally

thumb_up thumb_down +14

yo mama's so fat, we are all extremely concerned about her health

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What do you call a deer with no legs? Legs in the City

thumb_up thumb_down -11

knock knock you may come in

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Bill had two options the red truck or the blue sedan. Your mother is a whore.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What is funnier than an uncontrolled explosions? Most things, because explosions damage property, and cause deaths.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Gauss what ur mama said last night nothing i found her dead

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why was the horse sad? Because it seen a Tesco van in the distance.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Did you hear about the guy with five penises? Me neither, because that sounds like a very improbable aberration.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What is black, white and red all over? A nun in a blender

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Do you know what a lion really is? It's an over sized cat.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

why did the black go to the KFC because he likes fried chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A: Knock, Knock! B: Who's there? A: Boo B: Boo, who? A: Don't cry, it's only me!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What happened to the hungry child? He got out of Africa

thumb_up thumb_down +6

/\ The joke above was really dumb. \/ The joke below is pretty good.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why can't the T-Rex give high fives? Because they are extinct.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops