knock knock you may come in

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If you were a booger, I'd pick you and then wash my hands directly after because boogers are gross

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what happened to the christian when he died? nothing because god isnt real.

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Why did the black guy cross the road? He didn't because he forgot to precede crossing the busy street with caution; therefore he was critically injured and then placed in a hospital.

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women's rights

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You had 10 bricks on an airplane, you throw one. How many do you now have? 9. How do you get the elephant in the fridge? Open the fridge put the elephant in. How do you get the giraffe in the fridge? Open the fridge, take the elephant out, put the giraffe in. There was an animal meeting, all animals were invited. Which animal was missing? The giraffe, because he's still in the fridge. An old woman wants to cross a river that was full of crocodiles. How does she cross without getting eaten? The crocodiles were at the animal meeting, so she got across safely. She dies anyways. What happened? She was hit by the brick.

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what glows blue and howls at the moon at midnight? I dont know but i had sex with your mother.

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that awkward moment when there is no candy in the van.....

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Q: What did the doctor say to the man with terminal cancer? A: You have terminal cancer.

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The hooker walks into a bar wearing a vest and tight denim shorts. A drunken man proceeds in trying to have his way with her. He is thrown out for sexual mis-conduct and is currently waiting for his court date.

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A thief walks into a bank. He has an account there and withdraws 200 bucks.

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What do you do when a elephant is sitting on your fence? You hit it with a fridge

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How do you make a baby cry ? Throw a brick at his face

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So theres a priest, a rabbi, and an athiest on a cliff. They all remark at the beautiful view and take plenty of pictures with their respected families.

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How do you stop clowns from throwing cinderblocks at your car? Hire a hitman.

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Showcasing you? Really? I am tired too, yeah its daytime here as well, sleep well then. Hey, by the way, when you where like posting a lot of weird comments, where you trying to impress me?

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What ended in the year 1970? 1969

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How to make a plummer cry Kill his family

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Why couldn't the old man see? He was deaf

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why did the monkey fall out the tree? he lost his grip

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What's worse than crying over spilt milk? The Holocaust.

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Why did the man fall over screaming? Because he got shot in the leg

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Why did Billy fall off his bike? He tried to kill himself.

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Why did elmo jump of the cliff caus he wa depresed

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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