A man sees Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles and tells his friends about the incident. They believe the story, because it is entirely plausible that it actually happened.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

96

thumb_up thumb_down +28

*knock knock* Who's there? *Gorilla* Gorilla who? *Gorillas don't hoot, owls hoot*

thumb_up thumb_down -8

how do make you a child cry? break his fingers

thumb_up thumb_down +29

You cant spell chorus with out... Vagina!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Knock knock whose there nobody you have no friends remember

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why couldn't Dumbo fly? Because he had just been killed by an African Poacher, and dead elephants can't fly. This is very sad.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What does a black kid get for Christmas? Your bike

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did Lois say to Peter? Who cares... Family Guy is a stupid show.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What do you call a muslim on an airplane? A airline passenger.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did one tampon say to the other? Nothing. They were both stuck up bitches

thumb_up thumb_down -15

knock knock?? whos there?? Not yo cheese because i already ate it

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

You're on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What's faster than a black man running with a VCR? His son with the receipt of purchase as they realize VCR's are clearly outdated and must be returned right away.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

WHat is funnier than a baby swimming. - A baby drowing.!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do you get when you cross the color pink and pie? A penis ate the answer.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

YOUR MOMMA IS SO FAT WHEN SHE JUMPED FOR JOY........she didn't get stuck because there's nothing to get stuck in.

thumb_up thumb_down -44

What happend to the chicken that crossed the road? He got hit by a truck.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q: How many dead babies can you fit into a bathtub? A: Depends on the size of the tub and the size of the babies.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Roses are blue Colton is gay

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why are women so obsessed with not having penises? I'm serious. Imagine an ordinary woman out there, who is not doing any of the activities that the women-not-having-penises thing is famous for. But I can pretty much guarantee that under her clothes at that very moment, she isn't having a penis. And for no good reason. Sometimes I suspect women keep up the no-penis thing even in their sleep. Frankly, I find that creepy. Why are women so obsessed with not having penises?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

An slutty attractive secretary went into her boss' office He killed her.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the black man say to the white man? "Hi"

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops