What's the difference between Barney the dinosaur and Santa? Barney loves you.

Q: Why did Sarah fall off the swings? A: She had no arms Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

Why did the pirate have a peg leg? Diabetes

did you know that zach is the coolest person ever? no? well now you know

What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? "shit"

What is worse than a fly in your soup? Getting hit by a train.

Q: what do you call a camel with a garbage bag on its head? A: A ziploc baggie

Why can't Hellen Keller have kids? Because she's dead, therefore does not possess the ability to bear children.

Your mama's so fat she can't have children.

a man walks into a bar..... the man pulls out a gun and robs the place as he is exiting he bumps into a child the child falls in the street and is crushed by a bus. the bus in an attempt to avoid the child swerves and hits a maternity clinic next to a gas station that promptly explodes. the robber so distraught he trys to shoot himself but the gun misfired and the man was arrested and was raped repeatedly in prison...he now has aids...

Knock knock. Who's there? Fire extinguisher. Fire extinguisher who? POMEGRANITES.

Why did the chicken cross the road? because he was hungry and mcdonalds was across the street

A man walks into a bar, and he died.

how do u make a plummer cry? Kill his children.... :)

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Violets are not blue They are Violet

Why was Rosa Parks forced to sit in the back of the bus? Rebecca Black decided to sit in the front.

What is the difference between peanut butter andd jam! Jam is made from crushed fruit and gelatine while peanut butter is made from finely ground peanuts and is often sweetened with sugar.

What did one duck say to the other? "Quack!"

A man and a cucumber walk into a bar. They sit three seats away from each other and intermediately give nervous looks to one another. Finally the man stands up and declares "I hate bar jokes" and walks out.

What did the overweight blind kid get for Christmas? His parents died in a tragic car crash and he was left alone, fat and blind to fend for himself

A Mexican walks into a club.

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A bench is an inanimate object and a Mexican is a human being.

why did sally drown? because she had no arms or legs and couldn't swim.

Your moms so dumb she stuffed a battery up her butt and said i got the POWA!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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