Someone stole my cookie from the cookie jar! So I bought another cookie.

I am really good at math debating

What did the rabbi say to the bartender? Hi, Mark!

What did the nintendo Wii say as it went down the slide? They don't talk.

Where's my tractor?

Your dad is so old, he should go to a nursing home.

Q:Why did the boy have no friends A: because Ants are not considered friends

Q: What's worse than both of your parents dying in a terrible car accident? A: Sitting in the back seat with your grandparents.

What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor? I don't eat hot dogs. Thank you though.

What do you get if you cross a Kangaroo and a Sheep? They are too entirely different species and cannot be crossbred.

I took your mother out to a fine seafood dinner. I never called her again.

your mom is so fat that she should probably try a deit in the neer future.

Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease

What's the difference between Bobby and a plane? Bobby can be sexually molested.

There was once a guy who was so crazy...he was sectioned.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Nobody knows, it's impossible to determine the motivations of an animal that is incapable of speech.

What's orange and doesn't bounce? A flat basketball

I walked into a dark ally at night and ran into 2 black men They severely beat me then while unconscious brutally raped me. I then spent 5 weeks in the hospital in a deep coma.

did the dog explode? because it didn't have a bum hole

why was the water bottle empty? because bob drank it. stupid bob...

yo mama is so fat that wii fit puts her in the overweight category

A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

Why was the little girl sad? Why???? Because an elephant stamped on her, and shat on her.

What do an eagle and a off-white light bulb have in common? Nothing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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