I saw a man lying on the floor. He ate too much cake.

What do you call an asian man driving a plane? Nothing, you cannot drive a plane you can only fly it

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face." the horse says "my wife has terminal cancer."

Q: When do you know you've had to much to drink? A: When the zebra in your belly button starts talking to you

a man walks into the doctors office and says DOCTOR!, DOCTOR! IT HURTS TO BEND MY LEG!!! the doctor replies then dont bend your leg and the mans great pain eventually heals

Why is a bear like a cloud? They are both blue.

knock knock. no one answered so the man at the door went home.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick

A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

What number is funnier than 23? 24.

When life throws you lemons, Throw grenades.

There was a girl that got on the bus . The bus started moving as soon as sat . The bus driver looked up at the window and saw the girl coming closer . Every time she came closer , the more he looked , the girls nose kept on bleeding more and more . When the girl was right next to the bus driver , he started to shudder in fear looking forward , knowing that she is there . When he looks to his right , the girl looked at him , then looked at the window . And started to pick her nose .

Tiger Woods isn't a Tiger, He's a lion cheeta.

My wife's star sign was Cancer and its quite ironic how she died really... She was attacked by a giant crab.

Why did the Asian woman get into a car accident? She didn't pay attention in driver school and sped through a red light and hit a bus that killed 14 children.

Know what's funny? Jokes.

Your mother is so large she finds it difficult to fit into regular sized clothing

Why do blondes where pigtails? Because they look nice.

Why didn't Johnny's father come home? He was killed in Afghanistan.

How is nothing something if it is nothing?...

What do u call a black polar bear? A black bear

Two astronauts go kayaking in the Sahara Desert. How many pancakes does it take to shingle doghouse? Purple, because ice cream has no bones.

A woman leaves the kitchen.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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