a man walked in to a bar and said 'outch'

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did mr. Mackey say to his class. It's easy mkay

thumb_up thumb_down +49

How did the little boy get out of the forest? -He didnt, he was devoured by a pack of wovles.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what did the robot say to the centipede. Stop being a centipede!!!! Its funny because robots have arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did little Timmy get for Christmas after he was diagnosed with leukemia? A gift card to Bed Bath and Beyond because he was interested in redecorating.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q. What has two legs and is covered in red stuff? A. Half a dog

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Sex education in Texas.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: What is the difference between a black man and a Park bench? A: A park bench is an inanimate object.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

whats long hard and full of seamen? a submarine.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

whats fat, green and hairy? Nothing I would pleasure myself to.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How do you wake up lady gaga? Poke 'er face.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because the mas of the ice-cream gathered up enough potential energy to increase the velocity of said ice cream making a mess on the ground.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why did my penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Person 1: I'm really sleepy. Person 2: Then go to sleep.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

why did the boys voice get so deep? He just went through puberty

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What did the potato say to the man It said nothing it is a potato

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Whats the worst way to find out your married. Hungover

thumb_up thumb_down -32

i don't get it...none of these are funny.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

what is the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jews are people and regularly attend a synagogue and pizza is and italian food that many people find to be enjoyable to eat

thumb_up thumb_down -2

how do u keep a stupid person in suspense? how

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the baby stop crying? I hit him with a brick.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Roses are red, violets are blue shut the hell up, and sit the hell down

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you get when you have sex with a $10 prostitute? Nothing, she's clean. She may be low-scale, but she'll be damned if she's not careful.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops