jibby jobby

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Whats the difference between the holocaust and Norm McDonald? One can be laughed at the other is Norm McDonald.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get surgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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Why couldn't the hobo buy any clothes? They did not have his size available.

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What?

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have you seen ray charles' house? neither has he.

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What do you call a fat indian boy Eeeeeeeh fatty boy

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I'm a like whore

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Hey, the eighties called, they were really excited about inventing a phone that could call the future.

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Whats brown and sticky? A stick.

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Did you hear about that show where two crazy guy got on stage and the show had to be canceled. I didnt either.

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whats green and red green and red green and red? a frog in a blender.

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Who is best known for causing the Mt. St. Helens Eruption, The World Series Earthquake, and The Asian Tsunami in 2004? According to insurance companies, God.

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What is the best invention ever? Taking a crap reverse. So you can enjoy a nice bowl of aids.

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ive got nothing funny to say, so this is what its like to be a woman

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What black and white and red all over? A panther I was lying about the red and white.

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Why did little Sally fall off the swing? Because Sally has no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

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What's the best time to visit a dentist? Generally every six months or so.

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How do you get down from a horse?? You don't... You get down from a duck.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? About 1 or 2, then the neighbors would phone the police and you would be arrested for infanticide.

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What did the agnostic say when he turned blue? He said "wow why am I blue?"

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Your mother is so ugly corrective surgery would not be able to improve her appearance

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Why did he die? He was sick.

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Why did the little boy stop looking for his ball? Because he found it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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