Roses are Red And sometimes yellow My mother is mellow I have terminal cancer. I also fisted my grandpa's anus last night

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Justin Beiber walks into a bar. The bartender does not serve him because he is not the legal drinking age yet.

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George Washington delivered a short speech to his troops before they crossed the delaware river. Here it is: "Get in the boat."

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You're mom is so slutty, she has sex with many men.

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A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter what you call it, they aren't going to come.

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I am nobody Nobody is perfect Therefore, I am perfect

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What's black, white, and red all over? Numerous different objects because many different things can posses a variety of colors, including the ones listed above.

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What's the difference between a black man and a orange? One is a fruit and other isn't

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Your mom is so fat, that your gonna get a brother soon.

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Knock Knock? Who's there? The police The police who? I'm sorry mam but your husband is dead.

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If she is old enough to bleed, she probably uses tampons.

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A man walks into a bar. He backs up, unwraps it, and enjoys its chocolatey deliciousness.

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Wanna hear a funny story? Sure. Ok,

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Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because it tastes good.

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What would you do if the house you're sitting in now exploded? Nothing really, you would have died a horrible death.

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What do you get if you cross a football with Theo Walcott? A goal kick.

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Why werent you at my party? Becasue there was none!

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Why is Harry Potter fake Because its a movie

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender who recently got out of federal prison after a 20 year sentence.

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What did the man bring home from Africa? AIDS.

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kknocckkck knockckkckccck hue's theeeair? TTThhe pOOOliCCee. fffor whaaa? yyouu rr arreesstedd forrr drrunkkkc dddrivvinnng! Puuut urerre frreaakkki'n hannnddss uppp!

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A fat man buys a salad

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Let's write an anti-joke. K.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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