what did the duck with roller skates say to the camel? how are the wife and kids?

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker Face

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am a florist.

roses are red violets are blue if u wanna fight call 111 ( we r in new zealand)

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Cheese.

Knock knock. Who's there? Not your grandma! Cause she's dead! Come to the funeral

Why are bowling balls racist? They are not because bowling balls are incapable of having feeling therfore they cannot have racial thoughts or actions.

What is the street value of Amy Winehouse's ashes? Nothing. They are ashes, not drugs.

Who would win if Chuck Norris and God fought to the death? None they are both fictional.

Why Do Black Men Like Koolaid Because its red

Whats the definition of not winning? Charlie sheen losing custody of his son because he is a coked out, old man douche bag, who only gets told what he wants to hear because he forks out lots of money to gold digging hookers.

Whats green and fuzzy and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

you know whats funny... nothing.

What do you call a person with one eye and no arms? Names.

Knock Knock Whose there? A field full of mexicans A field full if mexicans who? F**k You

A duck flies into a bar. The bartender allows it to stay because it turns into a beautiful swan. The goose then lays a golden egg and the bartender stares in awe as a giant bean stalk grows out of the egg. He's ecstatic and really glad he let the flamingo stay with all the wonderful colors and magic going on.

Why did Bob fall off a cliff? He had an epileptic episode.

When life gives you oranges, make lemonade.

I don't always drink beer but when I do, I viciously beat my wife and children.

A muslim, a priest, and a raabi walk into a bar. All three of them agree that it hurt.

-What did the policeman say to the boy? -Hello.

Why did sally fall off the swings? She didn't have any arms. Knock Knock, Who's there? Not Sally, she doesn't have any arms.

Knock Knock Who's there? Eat a d!ck you sh!t fukk! I'm going have to ask you leave now

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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