What's a green tasty vegetable? None, they're vegetables.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Two Jewish Rabbis are sitting in a sandbox....

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Roses are grey Violettes are grey I am colour blind And I suck at rhymes

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A white straight man, a black gay man, and an Asian bisexual woman walk into a bar. They are enjoying their drinks until one overly intoxicated man makes a remark towards the group in reference to their diversity in race, sexual orientation, and sex. The bar crowd is enthused with the drunk man's genius in not only constructing a joke to cover all three categorical descriptions of the group, but in guessing each member's sexuality based on their respective appearances.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

How do you stop a car from crashing into a wall? -You can't, you are welcome to try, but please don't.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

A policeman walks into a bar. He goes inside to greet his friend who happens to be the bartender. Another man walks into the bar. This man is a regular customer and goes to the bar almost every other night. The policeman leaves and goes back on duty.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you call a cow in the grass... A cow in the grass... Dumbas*

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A man walks into a bar. And has a beer.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Womens Rights

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's the difference between a jazz musician and a cheese pizza? A cheese pizza is a food and a jazz musician is a person.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What do you call the twin towers? An airport

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the axe murderer. Did it work? No.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What is funny to watch but stinks of shit. Jews oh and SBB they both stink and are funny to watch.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Doctor: I have good news and bad news. The good news is that your parents survived the car accident. Kid: And the bad news is? Doctor: I have a horrible sense of humor, they're both dead. I'm so sorry.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why was the hiker upset? He was plummeting 1,500 feet to the ground after tripping on a rock too close to a cliff.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What's the difference between a large pizza and a Mexican? A large pizza can feed a family.

thumb_up thumb_down

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 24

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Knock-Knock Who's there? Ketchup. Ketchup who? Ketchup-mustard.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A black guy WALKS out of prison.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

ill have a no.9 a n.9 large

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A man is approached by a mysterious character in the streets, offering to tell him a dark and amazing tale. The man declines and walks away.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

ask me if im a house are you a house? no

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops